Practicing Self-Love


Who is the fairest of them all?

But first, why am I talking about loving myself?

I believe in order to love someone else, you must love yourself first.  Why is that?  If you aren’t happy with yourself, you will constantly find fault with your own actions.  Do you ever call yourself stupid when you don’t do something right?  Are you are a perfectionist?  Do you do things over and over trying to get it just right?  Does this hold you back from going after something that you really want because you are waiting for the perfect time or until you know more?  If you expect perfection in yourself, then you will mirror that in other people as well.  How you think about other people, can be a reflection of how you think about yourself.  Do you find yourself blaming others for anything that goes wrong?

When you start to accept yourself and even the slightest imperfections, your self-confidence will grow. Begin nourishing your mind, body and soul. You may need to turn off the programming that has been keeping you from achieving the life you have always wanted.

You have heard of that programming, haven’t you?  It’s called limiting beliefs.  They are beliefs you formed from circumstances growing up or encountered along the way.  It could be beliefs your parents passed on to you.  You may not even be aware you have them and that they are sabotaging your best efforts.  For instance, your parents could have drilled into your head how hard money was to come by.  Your siblings could have ridiculed you for little things, leaving you to feel inadequate.  (This was me, by the way!)

There are things you can do to turn around those beliefs.  One way is with Neuro-Linguistic Programming or NLP.  What is important is for you to identify what belief you want to change and then use the program to go about changing that belief.  It takes time. At least 30 days of practicing the program daily to effectuate a change.  You can check out my blog on NLP for a technique to get you started.

Practice saying positive affirmations to yourself by looking in the mirror and saying “I love you.  I really love you!” and “You are beautiful and smart!”  Make this a daily ritual.  Once you start practicing self-love, you will extend that love to others. When was the last time you actually put yourself first and did things that were enjoyable to you?  What makes you happy?  Get in touch with yourself. I enjoy doing a little shopping and then grabbing a bite to eat.  Sometimes, I buy myself flowers.  I like home-made organic soaps and lotions.   Using them makes me feel special.  I like having some quiet time to read or meditate.  Consider what little things bring you pleasure.

Ask yourself these questions to see if you are practicing self-love:

  1. Am I eating foods that nourish my body?
  2. Am I practicing eating meals mindfully by being fully aware and present?
  3. Am I staying hydrated by drinking enough water throughout the day?
  4. Am I getting enough exercise?
  5. Am I enjoying the beauty of nature by getting outdoors?
  6. Am I meditating regularly, giving my mind a break?
  7. Am I getting enough sleep?

In my Allentown transformational coaching practice, I help my clients discover what limiting beliefs they harbor that could be holding them back from living a more fulfilled life and have better relationships.  We also explore ways they can start practicing self-love on a daily basis.  If you have been living in the doldrums, and you would like to start LIVING now, contact me so we can schedule a one-on-one session to get you enjoying life to the fullest! or